Territory...

Ning: Daddy, why dogs simply wee wee everywhere?
Me : Ohh, because they want to mark their territories...
Ning : Oic...

Few days later, we were having our dinner at a restaurant and Ning quietly wetted her pants without letting us know.

Me : Ning!! How come you didn't ask Daddy to bring you to the toilet?
Ning : I wanted to mark my territory mah...
Me : !!!

Engineers are the Best Boyfriends

Received this "good" piece of "advice" from my engineering course mate. No offense to all those law, management, arts, medical etc. graduate out there :p Enjoy reading and so, what say you?!

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Let me tell you why girls should eventually marry an engineer over a Law, Management, Arts or Medical School Graduate. He has three distinct advantages over the rest of the graduates.

Advantage 1: Secure lifestyle
An engineer boyfriend can provide you with a secure lifestyle. At 27 years old, an engineer probably has a respectable, stable job that gives him a high income to own a car, invest, have a comfortable life, and get married and buy a house too.
Law graduates are still working as a lowly apprentice in law firm.
Most management graduates have just failed on their first business plan.
The arts graduate is still looking for a job.
And the medical school graduate is still living in a hospital.

Advantage 2: Unmatchable industriousness
An engineer boyfriend will dedicate an unimaginable amount of his time and effort to understand you. Engineers strain really really hard to understand their work. You can believe that they will try really really hard to understand women too, just like how they understand their work, once they believe that you are the one. So even if they don't understand you initially, they will keep on trying. Even if they still do not understand, they will figure out the correct method to keep you happy (e.g. buy diamond ring = 1 week's worth of happiness.) And once they find out the secret formula, they will just keep on repeating it so that the desired results appear.
Unlike the Lawyer who will argue with you.
The Management graduate who will try to control your spending.
The Arts graduate who will 'change major'.
And the medical school graduate who will operate on you.
And you know what, it's really so easy to make engineer s believe that You are the 'one'. Say that you like one of their project and they will be hooked to you forever.

Advantage 3: An engineer boyfriend will never betray your trust.
Let me first tell you what is wrong with the rest of the others - The lawyers will lie about everything.
Management graduates will cheat your money.
The arts graduate will flirt, and you probably just look like another cadaver to the medical school graduate.
Your engineer boyfriend is either too busy to have an affair, and even if he does, he is too dumb to lie to you about that.
Hence, an engineer is the most secure boyfriend that you will ever find - rich enough, will keep on trying to understand and please you, has no time for affairs, and too dumb to lie to you.

So girls, why procrastinate?
Get an engineer as your boyfriend!

新职员到岗

老板：万分欢迎，没有你们的公司肯定大不一样！
职员：如果工作太累，搞不好会辞职的
老板：放心，不会让这样的事情发生的！
职员： 双休日可以休息吗？
老板：当然了！这是底线！
职员：平时会天天加班到凌晨吗？
老板：不可能，谁告诉你的？
职员：有餐费补贴吗？
老板：还用说吗，绝对比同行都高！
职员：有没有工作猝死的风险？
老板：不会！你怎么会有这种念头？
职员：公司会定期组织旅游吗？
老板：这是我们的明文规定！
职员：那还需要准时上班吗？
老板：不，看情况吧
职员：工资呢？会准时发吗？
老板：一向如此！
职员：事情全是新员工做吗？
老板：怎么可能，你上头还有很多资深同事！
职员：如果领导职位有空缺，可以参与竞争吗？
老板：毫无疑问，这是我们公司赖以生存的机制！
职员：你不会是在骗我吧？

进入公司后 到真实的一幕（从后往前读）